Evil People are Bad

Hitler Was a Pussy, and Only Had One Ball

This story just came out confirming the age old legend that Hitler had only one testicle. Apparently it is in fact true. There was some document that was just released that included a WWI German medic's account of treating Hitler after he had suffered a battlefield injury at the Battle of the Sommes. The injury caused the loss of a testicle, among other things.

What is even funnier than it being true that Hitler was only half a man is that apparently all the German medics knew Hitler as "the screamer". Of all the injured people on the battlefield Hitler screamed the loudest. Pussy.

Unfortunately for the medic he specifically remembered Hitler after the war (probably due to all the whiny screaming) and when the Nazi's rose to power he blamed himself for saving Hitler's life during WWI. That's a fuckton of guilt.

America is the Least Racist Country on Earth

I'm not really up to date on all my Al-Qaida threats and fuck America-isms but this one has got to take the cake. They called Barack Obama a "house negro" in their latest video.

Is that ridiculous or what? They say that he only does the bidding of white people and won't change American policy, etc. etc. Basically they are trying to cover for the fact that Muslims don't hate Obama.

But seriously, as if terrorists couldn't have a worse rep. How do you top being blood thirsty murdering fanatically religious anti-semites? Throw some good old fashioned racism in there, that's how. I can't believe they forgot something as simple as that (I understand anti-semitism could be construed as racism but stay with me here).

Well terrorists I'm glad you decided to say that just before Obama begins his plan to refocus our military efforts on Afghanistan, ie WHERE YOU LIVE!

But onto my point that America is the least racist country in the world, and I base this on three things, these alone will prove my point and there is no need for further evidence one way or the other.

1. We elected a black guy as president
2. Terrorists hate black people (see above)
3. French people used to throw bananas at Thiery Henry (sp?) and other black players before and during soccer matches.

If number three happened in America that would be the sports scandal of the century. Yes things have been thrown at Barry Bonds but that nothing to do with him being black. Here in America we believe in equality. We throw things at you based not on the color of your skin but rather the content of your character (or in Philly if your last name happens to be Drew).

So thank you terrorists for making us look even better.

Firejoemorgan.com

So the greatest blog ever just ended.

Go check it out.

You'll learn more about baseball from this site than you will anywhere else, oh and also it's fucking hilarious.

I'll miss it forever.


www.firejoemorgan.com